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Fight Inside

She can't sleep
She turns on the lamp and stares at the ceiling, wiping tears from dry eyes.
She's so tired. Midnight. She taps the alarm clock just to make sure it's working. She must not be trying hard enough...
That seems to be a reasonable answer for alot of things lately.
Suddenly she can't take it. A cloud of air sweeps into her lungs and she rolls over. She can't stop the tears this time. It's almost suffocating.
She can't seem to find enough air between the waves of sharp emotion. The emotion that brought her to her knees in the first place.
Weeping. Until exhaustion meets dreams. But dreaming never lasts long. The hope of a good tomorrow becomes todays critical nightmare.
From the people she swore loyalty to, that betrayed her.
From the ones she trusted, that sold her out.
But for the one who has done no wrong, also finds herself watching the ones she loves suffer. And that brings more pain than the others combined.
She decides. Emotion is weakness. She turns out the light. And for those who find it better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all, she politely shakes her head in suppressed sentiment. Then closes her eyes. And dreams.

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